My Life

Soulmates And Twin-Flames, What’s The Difference?


“He was my soulmate, but honestly, I know that he was more than that. I’ve heard something about a twin-flame but I don’t really understand the difference. What is the difference between soulmates and twin-flames?”

The question above came from a long-term client and friend during her first full session reading with me. I connected her to her fiance who had passed and I remember telling her that I had never felt a love like this before; there was something different about it. Something rare.

My client confirmed that what I was feeling was accurate but to be honest, I didn’t even have the words to articulate exactly what I was feeling. The connection between these two was nothing I’ve ever felt before…something you would only see in the movies and long for. Imagine a love like Noah and Allie from The Notebook, but amplified by like a trillion. It almost seems unreal, doesn’t it?

That day I made a promise to my client to answer her question for her, to do the research, and to write this article. Not only did I want to give her an answer but at that point, I started questioning love in general… Was all love supposed to feel this way and maybe I just wasn’t really in love or was I in love and this was something almost virtually unheard of? I was ready to get to the bottom of it!

The short answer…

The Difference between a soulmate and a twin flame is that a soulmate is here to teach you lessons in life and a twin-flame is basically a mirror to your soul.

The details…

A soulmate could be a mother, daughter, bestfriend, spouse, whomever; it does not have to be a romantic partner as we often think. Long story short, a soulmate is someone in your life who is meant to teach you incredible lessons and help your soul grow. Soul + mate = friend for the soul ….get it?

Twin-flames are quite different; a rare gem among billions of stones. Below are a few signs you may have found your twin flame.

  • They are your other half and you know it almost instantly. It’s like your soul is looking into a mirror.
  • You and this person will vibrate on the same frequency. Your energy is actually charged when you’re around them.
  • It just works. It’s easy, virtually effortless, a fit.
  • This person will bring out the best in you.
  • You love to do the same things and it’s exciting for both of you.
  • The two of you hold the same values and are usually on similar journeys.

Twin-flames are extremely rare and the majority of people never meet theirs and that is totally okay! You can still be madly in love with someone who isn’t your twin-flame.

My husband is not my twin-flame and though a fairy-tale type love sounds wonderful, I’m ok with who and what we are – soulmates. I’ve been with this man since I was 17 years old and I love him unconditionally, but we are like miracle grow for the other’s soul. We have challenged each other, helped each other grow, and we have been on totally different paths all while making this whole relationship thing work.

We are pretty much the opposite of each other I mean, he is Mr. Logical and I am a professional medium…so there’s that. My husband is structured and responsible, he shows his love by acts of service, loves cars and football. I, on the other hand, I am free-spirited, spontaneous, show my love with affirmations and touch, love nature and art. He’s a meat and potatoes guy and I prefer a plant based meal. So many times I’ve asked myself how we even function…we are complete opposites, how does this work?

It works because he is my soulmate and we balance each other out. He reminds me that no we shouldn’t just go to Bermuda on a whim and I remind him that playing it safe all the time isn’t going to give you a fulfilled life.

We have two things in common however….our love for each other and the ability to make the other laugh. Whether I’m laughing at one of his corny “dad jokes” or he’s laughing at me messing up the words to a song I’m singing and dancing too like I’m on American Idol, we can always make each other laugh.

Sometimes I like to ask him why he loves me (this annoys him) and usually he says “because I just do.” but one time in particular he said …

“Because of how you see the world and the way you love.”

A twin-flame may be the mirror to your soul, but in some cases, a soul-mate might be just what you need to help you along your path.


Below is a great video where some of this information was found. I encourage you to check out his site! 


4 thoughts on “Soulmates And Twin-Flames, What’s The Difference?

  1. Hello,

    Thank you for the interesting article. As a past life therapist, I have met many twin flames in this lifetime and past lives. The truth is that twin flames are soulmates who got into a sacred union. So this divine marriage is the ultimate connection of two soulmates who want to walk the same path. Twin flames do not come from the same soul who split in two parts but instead they are two different souls who decided to get their relationship to the next level. This concept honors the soul as it does not need someone to complete them but someone who can deeply understand them in every aspect. We also have karmic connection with our parents and friends who are our soul family. We met them in past lives as well, the same way we met our soulmates and twin flame.

    It was a pleasure connecting with you today! Wishing you all the best!


    1. Love your take Zaria, thank you! I am always open to hearing what other spiritual practitioners know and experience! I have been thinking of getting a past life regression done for some time now, I will have to check out your site!

      Sending love!

  2. Ashley,
    Thank you so much for writing this article. It couldn’t have come at a better time. Lately ive been in a bit of a slump and negativity is spreading life wildfire onto all areas of my life. I realize that the negativity seed lies within me but I haven’t been doing anything to change my thoughts or my attitude. Losing my fiancé and my Twin Flame is by a long shot the hardest thing I’ve ever had to face. It’s been a year and a half and I’m still facing major issues that arise with grief like insomnia and depression. This is where my negative thinking comes from. I’m groggy and tired all of the time and I miss my love more than I could ever describe in words. I wish I could just have my life back. Reading your blog reminded me how special our relationship is and that we are connected in a much deeper way than this lifetime. I am connected with him forever and not even deathcsn take that away from me. I need to change my perception of my life right now. It’s a time to focus on myself. While the idea of that used to make me shudder, I’m actually really excited about my potential and opening myself to spirit and to healing. True, I lost the most important relationship in my life but if I go around negative all off the time, I’m not honoring that relationship. I used to think that I needed to suffer in order to make the people around me understand what I’ve been through but that’s not true at all. I know my fiancé would never want to see me hurting and I know he’s my biggest supporter and greatest protector on the other side. He want nothing more than to see me blossom and grow into the woman I as meant to be. I feel so lucky and honored to have such a powerful bond. I know that there are so many people who don’t get that luxury. The truth is I would go through the pain and loss a hundred times just for one more minute with him. So thank you for reminding me how special I am. And thank you for your wonderful support and friendship. You have helped me more than you will ever know. So I’m digging up that negativity seed and giving it away. In its place I will plant a seed of gratitude and watch as the pieces of my life start to effortlessly come together.

  3. I too am in a soulmate relationship. There have been many many lessons along the way, for both of us. Even ten years later, I can lie down next to him and the connection is just there, the harmony between us. Twin flame love is real and rare – I totally agree. I’m good with my soulmate though.

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