What is it really like to be a medium?
Throughout life, I have been able to pick up on things that the people around me could not. I felt things, heard things, and even saw things that I could not explain. I was able to tell when someone was being dishonest and had no clue how I knew. When there was someone I shouldn’t be around, I could feel it instantly. To be honest, I always knew something was different about me, I just didn’t know what until later in life.
At night I would see “people” in my room and I had paralyzing nightmares well into my 20’s. I hated being alone because well, I never felt that I was. It was like someone was always watching me. I spent most of my early life feeling uneasy.
There were a few people throughout life that knew about my abilities even before I did. There were also those that found my journals and thought that I should be medicated. I probably would have thought this too if I found something my son wrote saying that he saw figures walking around the corners of doors and heard voices throughout the house and in his head. To someone that has never dealt with or seen such things first hand, something like that would be pretty alarming.
There were specific rooms at family members houses that I couldn’t go in because every time I did I would hear voices. Throughout life, I’ve seen orbs, sparkles, and flecks of light that I had to try to pretend not to see. I learned quickly that while I thought everyone dreamt in vivid color and saw tons of faces when they closed their eyes that it wasn’t the case. Eventually, I quit talking about it and did my best to ignore it.
When we ignore our intuitive gifts, they may lie dormant for a bit as we try to condition ourselves out of them. The fact is, however, they don’t go anywhere we simply block ourselves from them for periods of time.
I’ve always just known things about people and felt the emotions of others. Upon meeting new people I would sometimes feel a sense of connectedness to them like I had known them for many lifetimes.
At 4 years old I started questioning organized religion. My reason? Something kept telling me that God was bigger than “this” and that “they” weren’t telling me everything.
All of my life I was confused by what I heard, felt, saw, and knew to be true. I was even more confused about why I was experiencing these things and who was I supposed to turn to? Most intuitives deal with this to some extent.
We search for someone that will understand but it’s hard to find that person (find that person here!). When we reach for a hand to hold through this process we are told our imaginations are over-active or that we need to stop thinking and talking about it because it’s wrong and it’s dark.
We then start to believe something is wrong with us. Intuitives tend to become anxious, secluded, and try to force themselves to be people they are not. We become so disconnected from ourselves because inside we know that we are different. Instead of living authentically we start trying to live like everyone else in an effort to make everyone more comfortable.
The fact is, we are just like everyone else but we are more in tune with who we really are. A spirit and not just a body.
It’s hard growing up as a medium. It’s also hard to uncover these gifts later in life. It can make you feel like you’re constantly living two different lives as two very different people.
Medium’s are like lights on a dark summer night. Everyone can feel our warmth and see our light even before we know it exists. Because of this we are often sounding boards for others and attract any and all beings in need of help (living or otherwise) just like bugs to a light.
This is often the case with our dreams as well. Until we learn about our gifts and understand how to set boundaries any and every spirit that needs light will come to us for help. Many mediums have a tough time sleeping until their gifts are under control.
In my 20’s my gift became quite undeniable. My grandmother came to me repeatedly! She was opening doors, waking me up with her laugh, and making books fall off the shelf when I asked her for a definitive sign that she was there.
Next, my childhood friend kept coming to me in my dreams as a much angrier version of himself.
Another friend showed up in a reading I bought for myself and asked me to help him cross over. In this reading, my gifts were also brought up by spirit.
After that, an acquaintance showed up in meditation and told me all about his mom and brother, both of which I had never met. The information he gave me was later validated.
While working on expense reports someone I hadn’t had any communication with in over 12 years popped into my head and refused to go away until I googled his name. He had died 3 months before.
It wouldn’t stop and it was back to back. I realized that I had a choice to either get this under control or continue to live in fear. So in a sense control it or allow it to control me.
Accepting my intuitive gifts was by far the best thing that I had ever done for myself. It truly changed my entire life for the better. But I’m not going to lie to you, it was a big decision and not the easiest of roads.
The decision to go public so that I could help others? One of the hardest decisions I’ve ever made but again one of the best! Coming out of the psychic closet is not an easy thing to do…
So to answer many peoples questions that have not shared in these experiences, no, most true mediums are not in it for the money.
We figure this out because we have to and because it affects our daily lives. In all honesty, telling people about it can sometimes make life more complicated initially (but it’s still so worth it).
Because I decided to embark upon this spiritual path, I understand now why my journey has been what it has. I understand all the people, the situations, and all the “coincidences” (though I don’t believe in coincidence anymore). Everything good, bad, and ugly, had to happen to help me get to where I am today.
This thing I once thought was a curse is now, to me, the ultimate blessing.
Mediums are healers. They pass along messages not only from dead people but also from higher guidance systems. Where do you think all of that amazing advice you get from your intuitive friend comes from?
We are channels for those in the light and this is how we contribute to this world. These streams of “advice” and soulful “hits” are our purpose and our way of shining the light where it’s needed most.
So what’s it like growing up as a medium? It ain’t easy. It’s depressing, it’s isolating, and sometimes it’s scary.
What’s it like to be a medium? Beautiful in every way.
With love, Ashley
To learn how to manage your intuitive gifts, start with the Intuitive Development Course and don’t forget to sign up for the secret Facebook group once enrolled!